Just another day....

The Alien is standing in my living room, wearing his "Kiss me I'm Irish" T-shirt, Toy story 3 underoos, and his Camouflage snow boots.  If anyone has ever thought that this boy is Human, I present to you Exhibit A!

As he states to the Diva, "I'm not Human." (with a mouth full of Peanut butter and Jelly)  We all know that this is an obvious statement, but we let him use humor to defend his true identity.

The Diva, has 'Squeeks' and is asking him if he likes her outfit.  As well as threatening to dress him in her dolly clothes.  "Because his Wedgie is showing!" she snaps back, when I ask her why she wants to dress him in the Ball gown.  Apparently though, according to the Diva, his wedgie is cute.?.?.?  I am utterly lost.

"Sit down at the table Alien!" I say.
"No, YOU are the alien!" he responds with, snarling and baring his teeth, as he runs back to the table.

If there has ever been a being on this Earth to intimidate me, he is the one.
The Commander is getting ready for the day, we are going to take the Diva to, The School of Divaliciousness.  She teaches there before Kindergarten.

Now the Alien is asking how Dragon's toot, And of course the Diva proceeds to instruct him on how a Dragon would in fact 'Toot'.  As I sit here on my couch, The Diva is showing me that we are wearing matching shirts. Squeeks is sitting on my shoulder, I sit paralyzed waiting for him to either bite off a piece of my ear or bite a hole in my shirt.

"What does 'S-O' mean MOM!!!"  yells the Alien.
"So." responds the Commander.
"NO, it means Dragon." snaps back the alien.

Everything spells dragon today.  Reminds me of the guy in 'The Stand' "M-O-O-N, that spells, Truck...."

The Alien has definitely got an imagination.

"Chew you food Alien."  I say.
"Or I am going to call the Mother ship." throws in The Commander.
Silence, is all we get, the Alien realizes that is an empty threat.  Alien's don't have cell phones. Imagine if they did, you could just text an alien.  "Hey, pick up my neighbor 2night.  He needs 2b abducted."  Or, "Call me, we should party again, that probe thingy you had was a riot."

"I am growing a horn Daddy." Exclaims the Diva.
"Uh-oh," I respond, "Mommy, she is growing a horn...."
"She is after-all a Mormon," replies the Commander with a chuckle.

Anyway, the time has come for me to head out into the Wilderness, I have to go prepare the Covered Wagon for the long trek to the Elementary school.  I need to get the horses ready, and check the tire pressure.  Yes, we may still use covered wagons, but at least we have caught up enough with civilization that we have tires and 24" spinners.

Timmy OUT!!!